Day One, Post Two.

Kayso. I don't understand why people judge you based on your beliefs. Like really. You were my friend before, I haven't changed. I just came out &told you something you didn't know . I'm still the same person I was, you just have more knowledge of me. NO ONE is going to like EVERYTHING about you. Not your friends. Not your teachers. Not your siblings. Not your parents. NO ONE. So I don't see why when I don't like doing something you do, I'm a bad person or I'm bold or you don't want to be my friend anymore. It's really stupid to me. I don't understand. Someone should explain it to me. To my real friends, I LOVE YOU GUYS WITH EVERYTHING I HAVE IN ME. To the ones who don't want to talk to me because I don't like going to church and don't care about religious stuff, FUCK YOU. You shouldn't have been my "friend" in the first place. Do me a fucking favor and lick my right nut and choke on the left.

Day One.

So I came home from church not too long ago. I wasn't exactly paying attention to the pastor because I was thinking too much, I do this and it gets in the way of everything. It's very hard for me to concentrate lately. But anyway. My family was always raised in a Christian way; the belief that God started life and we should all praise him for giving us life &having his son die on the cross for our sins. That idea. But I spoke with my uncle this past weekend and he put some thoughts into my head, idk whether good or bad. But I'm not really into the whole religious thing&I feel wrong for it because that's how the rest of my family is. My mom said to me that I didn't seem like I was paying attention and I really couldn't relate to most of the things the pastor was saying. I felt like I shouldn't be there. I always get "Awh, it's so wonderful that you're going to church with your mother" and blah blah blah. But I go because I HAVE to, not because I WANT to. I don't understand how you can believe something with your spirit and all that stuff. It doesn't make sense. So basically I feel like a disgrace to my family because I'm not all into the Holy stuff like they are. If I died today, I wouldn't know whether I'd go to heaven or hell. I believe there is a God but I'm not super interested in learning about everything they teach in church. I'm 15. My plan right now is to finish high school, have fun &wait for the summer. I could really care less about all the religious stuff right now.